Mother’s Day: Clara Infante
Becoming a mother is a life changing experience, no matter where you are from. To celebrate Mother’s Day, a handful of inspiring mothers from all over the world share their thoughts on family rituals, loneliness, morning routines and on the lessons motherhood have taught them
What is the most important thing your own mother has taught you?
” My mother has taught me the value of perseverance. She has always been determined to push through difficult situations, sometimes to the point of being like a bulldozer. Her ability to overcome obstacles has shown me that anything is possible. It’s a quality that all mothers have. I think every mother can relate to the feeling of having reach your maximum but somehow manage to get through.”
What family rituals do you value the most?
“When we lay in bed in a giant human pile, hugging and kissing. I know it won’t last forever, so I really cherish it.”
Name one thing you have learned about yourself since becoming a mother.
“That I am a work in progress, like a giant onion, and that with every season of my children’s life, I get to peel off the layers and get to know myself more and become more complex and resilient. Although my existence is now intrinsically linked to my children’s, I continue to prioritize my personal growth.”
What does your morning routine look like?
“Honestly? The mad rush-out-the-door-routine! We do have a brief moment of calm when we all gather around the breakfast table to say good morning and eat breakfast. But our mornings are often hectic, and it’s not very fun or pretty, but it’s just part of having three small kids.”
How do you spend five minutes on yourself?
“I close the door to my bedroom as quietly as I can and disappear into my wardrobe, pulling different garments to dress myself in. I love nothing more than choosing my outfits every day; it’s a really nice reminder to take care of myself and the way I look because it completely affects how I feel about myself.”
Do you ever feel a sense of loneliness in your motherhood?
“Don’t we all?! Motherhood is a terribly lonely place. We are bombarded with idyllic imagery of motherhood from the time we are little right up until adulthood where we’re fed the same narrative via social media and pop culture. The reality is that motherhood is incredibly difficult and most of the time…not idyllic at all. It makes it that much harder for us to feel like we can pick up the phone and call a friend…so yeah, it’s lonely. My personal way of getting support in those times has always been via social media. I know it’s weird, but it makes it easier to put it out there to a bunch of strangers than to reach out to a friend directly. The bonus is that I’ve really grown a community on Instagram of other moms who are really supportive in those moments…and that my real-life friends also usually intercept one of those digital SOS’s and call me and offer to help. What I love the most about airing my dirty laundry so publicly is that it normalizes the idea that we aren’t perfect and that there is a duality to motherhood: you can love your children and also be desperate to get away from them.”
Text Anna Rolin, Andrea Smidt
Clara infante, 36, mother to Eliot, 6, Lenny, 4 and Atlas, 3. Designer, living in Olivella, Spain.